Automatically translated.View original post

The name is confusing, isn't it?

Mom is not good at friends

I got a question.

Thank you very much.

There are quite a few parenting mothers who have this problem.

You don't have to force yourself to date, but for the sake of your child, you should at least do spinach.

Since the standard is children, please keep in touch with yourself within a reasonable range.

# life # trouble # happiness # mindfulness  # mom # parenting

2024/10/4 Edited to

... Read more「ママ友」って言葉、便利だけどちょっと雑で、モヤっとしやすい呼び方ですよね。私も“友達”と思うほど近くないのに、友達みたいな距離感を期待される感じが苦手でした。だからまずは、言葉を自分がラクなものに置き換えるのが一番効果ありました。 ■「ママ友」の言い換え(しっくりくる順に) ・園(学校)の保護者の方/保護者の皆さん ・同じクラスの○○さんのママ(“○○ちゃんのママ”) ・連絡先を知っている保護者/連絡が取れる方 ・顔見知りの保護者 ・(仲が良いなら)友達/ママ友じゃなく普通の友達 私は「保護者の方」って言い方に変えたら、気持ちが一気に事務的になってラクでした。“友達”って呼ぶほどの関係じゃない、と自分で線引きできるからです。 ■付き合い方の基本は「友達」じゃなく「ママ友業」 OCRにもあったけど、私も“仕事と一緒”って考えると落ち着きます。好き嫌いをはっきり出す場じゃなくて、子どもが安全に過ごすための連絡業務。期間限定(早ければ保育園、長いと中学くらいまで)って思うと、必要以上に消耗しません。 ■最低限やるとラクになるホウレンソウ(相談・連絡・報告)例 ・「運動会のパトロールの件、先生に伝えました」 ・「今週のPTA役員会、中止になりました」 ・「お土産のお菓子、予算いくらにします?」 ポイントは“短く・丁寧に・事実だけ”。感情を乗せないほどトラブルが減りました。 ■「友人の妻」の呼び方に迷うとき ママ友界隈だけじゃなく、呼び方って本当にややこしいですよね。友人の奥さんは、会話なら「(友人)の奥さん」「(友人)の奥さま」が無難です。本人に向かうなら「○○さん」で十分で、“誰かの妻”で呼ばない方が角が立ちにくい印象でした。 ■「親族」と「親戚」の違いもついでに整理 呼び方に迷う系でよく混ざるのがここ。ざっくり、親族=法律上の関係としての身内、親戚=血縁や婚姻でつながる身内の“日常的な呼び方”として使われることが多いです(厳密な範囲は文脈次第)。家系図・系譜も似ていて、家系図は家族関係を図にしたもの、系譜は家の流れや系統をたどるイメージ。 結局、10年後20年後に残るのは、気づいたら“普通に友達”として一緒にいる人だけでした。今は「子どものためのホウレンソウだけやればOK」と割り切って、自分の心がすり減らない距離感を優先しています。

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