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Quote from Henry Wodsworth Longfellow

2024/2/18 Edited to

... Read moreคำคมสอนคนของ Longfellow ที่ว่า “เราตัดสินตัวเองจากสิ่งที่เรารู้สึกว่าสามารถทำได้ ในขณะที่คนอื่นตัดสินเราจากสิ่งที่เราได้ทำไปแล้ว” เป็นประโยคสั้น ๆ แต่กระแทกใจมาก เพราะมันอธิบายความต่างของ “โลกในหัวเรา” กับ “ภาพที่คนอื่นเห็น” ได้ชัดเลย จากประสบการณ์ส่วนตัว เวลาจะเริ่มทำอะไรใหม่ ๆ เรามักประเมินตัวเองจากความรู้สึก เช่น “ยังไม่พร้อม” “ยังทำได้ไม่ดีพอ” หรือ “กลัวพลาด” แล้วก็เอาความรู้สึกนั้นมาตัดสินตัวเองทันที ทั้งที่จริง ๆ แล้วคนอื่นไม่ได้เห็นความคิดทั้งหมดของเรา เขาเห็นแค่สิ่งที่เราทำออกมาเป็นรูปธรรม—ผลงาน ผลลัพธ์ หรือการลงมือทำ ถ้าอยากใช้คำคมสอนคนนี้ให้เกิดประโยชน์ ลองทำ 3 อย่างนี้ดู (เป็นวิธีที่ฉันใช้แล้วช่วยได้มาก): 1) แยก “ความรู้สึก” ออกจาก “ข้อเท็จจริง” ความรู้สึกว่า “ทำไม่ได้” ยังไม่ใช่ข้อเท็จจริง ให้ลองถามตัวเองว่า ตอนนี้มีหลักฐานอะไรบ้างที่บอกว่าเราทำไม่ได้จริง ๆ หรือแค่ยังไม่เคยลองทำแบบจริงจัง 2) เปลี่ยนจากคิดว่าเก่งแค่ไหน → ทำอะไรได้แล้วบ้าง คนอื่นตัดสินจากสิ่งที่เราทำไปแล้ว เพราะฉะนั้นเราก็ควรโฟกัสที่ “ความคืบหน้า” เช่น วันนี้ทำเสร็จ 1 หน้า ส่งงาน 1 ชิ้น ฝึก 20 นาที สิ่งเล็ก ๆ พวกนี้สะสมเป็นผลงานได้ 3) สร้าง “หลักฐานของตัวเอง” ด้วยการลงมือทำทีละนิด ฉันชอบตั้งเป้าเล็ก ๆ แบบทำให้เสร็จใน 10 นาที หรือแค่เริ่มเปิดไฟล์ขึ้นมาก่อน พอทำได้จริง ความมั่นใจก็เพิ่มขึ้นแบบไม่ต้องฝืนคิดบวก สุดท้าย คำคมสอนคนนี้ไม่ได้บอกให้เราแคร์สายตาคนอื่น แต่กำลังเตือนว่า ถ้าเรามัวตัดสินตัวเองจากความรู้สึกอย่างเดียว เราอาจหยุดก่อนที่จะมี “สิ่งที่ทำสำเร็จแล้ว” ให้เห็นด้วยซ้ำ ดังนั้นถ้าวันนี้กำลังลังเล ลองลงมือทำเล็ก ๆ ก่อน แล้วค่อยให้ผลงานเป็นคนพูดแทนเราเอง

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