When social anxiety hits at a Con

Going to Anime NYC for the first time was an absolute dream come true, but also a source of immense apprehension. As someone who experiences social anxiety, the thought of navigating thousands of passionate fans, bustling exhibit halls, and the unique social conventions of a major convention like Anime NYC was incredibly daunting. I remember standing outside the Javits Center, taking a deep breath, and telling myself, “Okay, RubyQueen, you can do this.” What exactly are these “social conventions” at a con, you might ask? Well, they’re the unwritten rules and expectations that shape interactions. For instance, the etiquette around cosplay: when is it okay to ask for a photo? How do you compliment someone without making them uncomfortable? Or the unspoken agreement about queuing patiently for panels, autographs, or exclusive merch. For me, every interaction felt like a minefield where I could accidentally say or do the wrong thing. My social anxiety hits hardest when I feel like I'm not understanding the room, and a convention is essentially a giant room with its own unique language. One of my biggest fears, especially with the thought of getting 'interviews and content' being created, was being approached unexpectedly. What if someone wanted to talk to me about my cosplay (if I were wearing one) or my opinions on an anime? My mind would race, trying to predict every possible scenario. I found that having a few prepared phrases helped immensely. A simple, “Thank you, I’m just heading to a panel right now,” or “I appreciate the compliment!” could diffuse an awkward moment without making me feel rude. What really helped me conquer some of these anxieties at Anime NYC was focusing on small, manageable goals. Instead of telling myself I had to meet new people, I aimed to simply enjoy the atmosphere. I’d pick out a few panels I was genuinely interested in and focus on those. I’d spend time in quieter areas, like the artist alley, where interactions felt more one-on-one and less overwhelming. I also made sure to schedule breaks, stepping outside for some fresh air or finding a quiet corner to recharge. It’s surprising how much a 15-minute break can reset your mental state when you’re dealing with sensory overload. Another strategy I discovered was to embrace the anonymity that a large convention can offer. While it feels like everyone is watching, the truth is, most people are absorbed in their own con experience. This realization allowed me to relax a bit more and just be present. I even found a sense of camaraderie in the shared enthusiasm for anime and manga. Observing how others navigated the social conventions, like politely waiting their turn or offering a quick high-five to a fellow cosplayer, actually helped me learn and adapt without feeling pressured to participate beyond my comfort zone. By the end of my time at Anime NYC, I realized that while social anxiety can make any social convention feel like a huge hurdle, with a little preparation and self-compassion, you can still have an incredibly rewarding experience.