To all the Bullies

Were/are you a bully? If you need to take sometime to think or question yourself and your actions, chances are you probably are/were one.

There are many types of bullying- verbal, physical and even emotional. I was bullied during my pre teens, it was mostly emotional bullying - they isolated me, 'kicked' me out of the clique and I had to eat lunch in the toilet alone because I can't let anyone see me eating alone in the canteen, its too embarrassing. I just did not have the capacity to fight back or to move on and to not give a hoot. I stuck to the same group of people despite their gaslighting, choosing me depending on their mood. Of course, as a teen, friends are the most important and direct aspect of your social life. A part of you will feel so lost without friends, so you just hang onto dear life thinking you are going to get them to 'accept' you again, given the stupid and immatured mindset of pleasing others and repeatedly forgiving them when they are nice to you, total disregard of your own feelings on how they treated you before as long as they are 'nice' to you now.

Of course, we were all young, still exploring relationships, immature, young and dumb. I was in the era of little to no exposure to social media - FB just started during that time i think- 2009/2010. Therefore I felt like it could have been a lot worse if social media was full blown present then.

I have seen countless idiotic videos of bullies uploading them on socials showing how they bully their victims and i just want to say, PEOPLE ARE KILLING THEMSELVES over getting bullied and they think it is a joke to post it on their socials and post about it thinking they don't get to suffer consequences? When they do get caught, they say they won't do it again but somehow still walk away scot-free. You'll hear their oh so sad sob stories and you know what, they WILL repeat their offences. They MUST face the law, get counselling and do volunteer work. I know the most common background of a bully stems from a troubled family background, neglect or abuse but no excuses since they are dragging the innocents into their misery, that's where counselling comes in.

Most teachers won't do much about it because either they won't know about it in the first place until it goes viral somewhere or, they can't be bothered because to them its just another job. Even if they know about it and something is done, most will not push to fight for the victims (but I know for sure a minority group of teachers will, the victims just have to be lucky enough to meet one). The school management or really anyone with decision-making powers got to take these social issues seriously, especially now with social media, there are people of all sorts and most are heavily influenced by it. I can't seem to put into words how people are so different now with social media VS in the past before its existence - most people are just so full of themselves, so so entitled.

As a victim myself, then a teacher and now a mother, I cannot emphasize how important it is to raise your kids to be resilient, to fight back, to stand up for the good, to be confident individuals. I will let my students know my expectations at the beginning of a school year, that any sort of bullying will not be tolerated and they will need to face consequences if it is severe. I'll then revisit this topic and continue to emphasize it throughout the year. My daughter is 3 this year and just started going to school. It is never too young to give in simple terms - what a bully does. I am happy to visit the principal's office knowing my child fought back because she was bullied - I am not inculcating violence but fighting back is a very brave thing to do, you don't have to be nice to people who aren't nice to you - it's as simple as that.

Even as adults, i've heard stories of bullying at workplaces. Its horrible given we are adults who are SUPPOSED TO BE matured and civilized but turned out so corrupted - our whole world is just a sad ball of mess. So as mentioned previously, it is so crucial to try our best to build a strong foundation for our kids since we can't control all these monsters walking among us.

Through these life lessons though, I've learned to be so much stronger though ironically, i do suffer some form of anxiety but there are many factors contributing to that. I am definitely a much more resilient person, I don't give a hoot whether or not you like what I do or say and if you don't respect me as a human, don't expect me to reciprocate. If you are genuinely nice, expect me to return double the niceness back to you.

If you were bullied or currently facing issues with getting bullied, feel free to comment/rant here, it is an open space for all with no judgement 🩶

#bullyingawareness #Parenting101 #teenagerlife #WhyILemon8 #SocialDiscussion

Check out my small biz! @thepatchthings 🩶

2025/4/29 Edited to

... Read moreBullying is more complex than many realize, especially when it hides behind social media drama. This 'drama' blurs the lines and often masks real bullying, teaching teens to avoid addressing their problems genuinely. Many teens don't even recognize when they're part of or witnessing bullying because it's disguised as everyday conflict or social misunderstandings. From my experience, one significant challenge is the lack of effective response from adults, especially in schools where teachers may overlook signs or choose not to intervene strongly enough. This lack of action can leave victims feeling helpless and isolated. That’s why raising awareness from a young age is crucial. It’s important for parents and educators to teach children about empathy and how to recognize bullying—not just the physical but the emotional and psychological forms too. Encourage children to express their feelings openly and to stand up for themselves and others respectfully but firmly. Teaching kids to recognize bullying behavior helps them avoid getting trapped in harmful social dynamics. Moreover, the rise of social media has amplified the impact of bullying, making it a pervasive issue beyond the schoolyard. We must teach resilience in this digital age, including how to manage online interactions safely and how to report harmful behavior thoughtfully. As adults, reflecting on bullying helps us understand how deeply it affects mental health and interpersonal relationships. Sharing stories and reflections in safe spaces can empower victims and promote community healing. If we want to break the cycle of bullying, society must foster kindness, respect, and accountability at every level—from home to the workplace. If you or someone you know struggles with bullying, remember that seeking support and sharing your experience is a brave first step toward recovery and change. This ongoing dialogue is essential to making our communities safer and more compassionate.

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